i’m trying so fucking hard to survive and i feel like that’s all i’ve done my entire life. i’m just trying to make it through every day and some days are harder than others and lately all i’ve had are hard days. i don’t understand anything that’s happened. i don’t know what i did to deserve any of this. my childhood and my family and my relationships are all so fucked up and i can’t talk to anyone about it because half of my friends are being shits to me and the other half are just people i like to party with. i didn’t do anything to him to justify what he did. and i didn’t do anything to deserve an asshole dad and a shitty mom. and i didn’t do anything to haley to justify her cheating on me. and i didn’t mean to hurt taylor and she won’t even let me explain. college is the only hope i still have and i’m doing everything i can to survive until then, but it’s so draining and there are moments every single day when i just want to give up. all i’ve ever wanted is some understanding and empathy but people are so fucking unwilling to give that